I Am Not Afraid
by Jasmine Nicole
Summary: Harry's view of the final battle. One-shot, mild slash


Bodies, screams, curses, and flashes of green light everywhere. It's finally come down to this. I don't think anyone should be surprised, deep down I believe we all knew this would eventually happen. Two sides, black and white, raging against one another. And then there's those in the gray, the ones who worked for both sides, torn amongst the fighting. Am I afraid? Not for myself, no, I am not afraid. This is my battle and I know why I'm here. Afraid is what I am for those of whom I love. For Ron, my best friend. I haven't seen him since the last battle a few days ago and I know in my heart that we lost him, even if we never found his body. For Hermione, who is doing her best back at the makeshift hospice tent as a healer. For Remus, who has fought bravely along side of me, and is no longer anywhere in sight. For countless others whom I've encountered in this past year, and who I know will give their all in this battle. For them I am afraid, and not myself. And you, I'm afraid for you, too.  
  
I have yet to see you, as we have yet to face his higher-ranking servants. I'm no fool to think they won't come... that there won't be more than this. It's been 2 months and we've not seen the evil bastard himself yet. I have no doubt though, that if you actually went to him, you and a select few would be right at his side.  
  
I know this day will be monumental when I see him arrive. One way or the other, things will end soon. Or will they? Will this battle, no matter how petty it started, ever end? Destruction through power, corruption, prejudices... all the things I'm fighting against, and yet I wonder at this point if it's all in vain? Even if- no, when our side wins? Will it all continue afterwards? If not through Voldemort himself... then through another? Realizing this topic is irrelevant at this place and time, I draw my mind back to where the Dark Lord has apparated onto the battlegrounds.  
  
They don't even bother wearing masks anymore, the death eaters, and he arrives surrounded by them. Apparently this is the treasured "inner circle", including both Lestranges, Nott, a man with short brown hair I don't recognize, Lucius, 'no surprise there' I scoff mentally, and....you. You notice me instantly and stop advancing as the others continue. The aurors have already started flinging curses your way and I'm screaming at you in my mind to stop acting like an idiot and move! You realize this and dodge a few on-coming hexes, stunning the person who was undoubtedly attempting to kill you. You look to me again, your cold eyes filled with something else... possibly disbelief. Did you really think we wouldn't be in this situation one day? On either sides of the battle, fighting for two different causes?  
  
We had those conversations dozens of times back at school. Plans of just running away, neither of us joining either side, living together, somewhere where no one would find us. You knew though.... you always knew, that this was my battle and I'd be here. You had changed so much over our years at school, and yet when it came down to it, you were still as loyal as ever to your family name. And I, as always, was Harry Potter. Savior of the Wizarding world. It wouldn't work and we knew it.... but we tried with all our might. Through hell and high water we tried-- and yet here we are.  
  
The remaining death eaters and the 'inner circle' spread out, your father, true to form, never leaving Voldermort's side. Slowly amidst the battle you make your way towards me. Curses are flying everywhere and I know, I can feel it...this is the worst and most intense the battle has ever been. Bodies lay crumpled around me. Some dead, some pleading for death. I step in front of one body and allow sorrow to wash over me for a brief moment. Remus. I kneel down and bring his palm to my lips. I kiss it softly and sweep my hand over his face, closing his eyes. I stand again and you are there, wand in hand, but it is not raised. I grab you roughly, pulling you behind a nearby tree that was smoking from the curse it had recently recieved.  
  
You press your lips forcefully against mine and for a second my world stops. Running away together seems like a great plan now. But no, this has to be finished.  
  
"Are you afraid?" you ask quietly  
  
"No"  
  
"Angry?"  
  
"Not at you"  
  
"I'm here, by his side, fighting against you--"  
  
"Where the both of us always knew you would be"  
  
"My family, Potter. You understand...."  
  
"Yes"  
  
We move aside quickly as a curse hits the tree we were behind, causing a loud crack.  
  
"I love you" I tell you, letting my hand caress you face for the briefest of moments  
  
"And I you"  
  
I knew right then, this would be the last time we saw one another. As hard as we tried and as much as we loved, this was it. A soft, quick kiss later, you submerged yourself back into the battle. I turn to face the scene and I see him, Voldemort. His face twists into an ugly sneer as he spots me. I know that one, or quite possibly both of us, will not make it out of this alive. My path is set and I begin to stride toward him. This-he... is my battle. I'm fighting for my parents, for Sirius, for Remus, for Ron, for those we've lost in battle, and for you.  
  
And I am not afraid. 


End file.
